Neural Justice
Forget the suspension of license - I never had one. But a thousand hours community service! I know, I know what you’re thinking - lucky not to have a jail sentence or a conviction recorded. Well, I had a good record didn’t I? And it all came down to some software in a network of computers sitting on a bench in the court. Cursors blinking as if they were barely awake. Did they have to put those ridiculous wigs on the screens. Ludicrous. Microsift JusticeScales v34! Every single judicial case, precendent, sentencing note, appeal, sentence, crime, victim impact statement….all in a huge artificially intelligent neural network.
“Continually learning, continually expanding” - so says the advertising campaign. Continually learning how to rip us off, continually expanding into every facet of our lives.
Ali finally showed up for a visit several hours after the limo event. When all the sugar had left his system. He felt so guilty he paid for my lawyer, who after getting advice from a team of legal software engineering experts (in fact, one of them was an ex-Microsift employee with a grudge), formatted my case details in such a way as to convince the neural network that I deserved a lenient sentence. Talk about legal arguments, they inserted a recursive loop that sent those networked judges into a spin. They went from laptops to lap dancing in a few milliseconds. In the end, the court sherrif had to reboot the lot of them, which according to the rules of double jeopardy (Computer-assisted justice Regulations 2020 Article 14), meant that I got the default sentence (a thousand hours community service) and couldn’t be retried.
